The Crabby Cook - by Jessica Harper

I would happily take up golf, If it meant a close encounter with George Clooney…
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So I heard on the news that the animal rights group PETA came up with the stunning idea of creating a line of tofu flavored with George Clooney’s sweat. I know, OMG, right? Who wouldn’t buy that?

Apparently someone at PETA got their hands on a gym towel soaked in Clooney’s persperation and, bang, the idea for CloFu was born. So far, Clooney doesn’t seem too excited about CloFu. (He’s reported to have said, “As a mammal, I’m offended.”) But PETA is not easily discouraged; I have faith they can make this thing happen.

By the way, if anyone at PETA is reading this, I would like to volunteer for the job of harvesting Clooney’s sweat. It’s something I’ve dreamed about many times, so I mean, it’s sort of like I’m virtually experienced and I could be good at this line of work. I would even defer a salary, if that makes me a more desirable candidate. Read More