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Homewrecker’s Pasta

I’ve found that this is one of those dishes that make men want to marry you. I could be imagining things (moi?), but I don’t think so: if you serve this pasta at a dinner party, the men look at you differently after the first bite. This causes their wives to look at you differently, too, of course, in a way that’s less friendly. Since I only have dinner parties once or twice a century, this is actually not much of a problem for me, but you should be forewarned.

In my family, only me and my dog Oliver love this dish.  The rest of the group are frightened by foreign cheeses. But if your family are more adventurous (and sick of mac and cheese), or if you’d like your male dinner guests to want to marry you (you homewrecker!), this is the dish for you.

¼ pound each fontina, Gorgonzola and Bel Paese cheeses, cut in small pieces
4 Tbls. butter
Freshly ground pepper
A pinch of nutmeg
2/3 cup grated Parmigiana-Reggiano cheese
1 cup cream
One pound dried (or fresh) fettucine

Melt the butter, Gorgonzola, fontina and Bel Paese together in a saucepan, and add pepper and nutmeg. Stir in half the grated P.-R. and all the cream, cook for five minutes at a simmer and then set aside.

Cook the pasta according to the directions on the box until it’s al dente (tender), about ten minutes. (If it’s fresh it’ll just be a couple of minutes.) Drain it and mix it with the cheese sauce. Serve immediately with extra grated P.-R. on the side.

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5 Responses to “Homewrecker’s Pasta”

  1. Tim Cunnane Says:

    Hi Jessica. I just discovered my newest ingredient buddy. I can’t find creme fraich in my local market, but decided to try Mexican crema. It’s thick, doesnt separate when heated and tastes great. I use it now in my Alfredo, soups, Strogonoff and even banana bread. Instead of sour cream.
    Tim

  2. jessica Says:

    Yum. Thanks Tim, this is a great tip!

  3. Alisa Says:

    This is exactly what I need right now!I’ll be looking for these cheeses and make this one soon.

  4. joanna Says:

    OOOOOhhhhh, so THAT’S how to get a husband!? And all this time I’ve just been beating guys with baseball bats. This would be preferable (and more legal) route. A tad more expensive, for the cheeses, but still cheaper than bail.

    But seriously, I LOVE fettucine! I have to confess that I don’t go the proper cheese route. Too pricey. But I do use garlic butter and whipped cream. My niece thinks I’m amazing because I cook this stuff and don’t just order out or buy it prepared. I also use Spinach or broccoli as a color contrast and because I love those particular veggies.

  5. William Says:

    Not surprised this is called Homewrecker’s pasta. Just reading the recipe makes me want to marry you and I’m gay.
    I was thinking of trying your Non Sono in Italia spaghetti but I think I’ll start with this one for our next bachelors weekly gathering (all straight guys except me – will let you know if any of them turns queer after a few bites, unless their girlfriend kills me first.)

    BTW, found out recently that one of the regulars at those gatherings was a big fan of yours too. We spent the rest of that evening butchering songs from Phantom of the Paradise. (And yes, he’s still straight in case you’re wondering.)

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