I admit to being an Obamaniac, and now that we’re down to the wire, I’ve got the election day jitters. I find I’m seeking comfort: I can’t take the suspense one more. big fat minute.
Today I lined up one therapeutic activity after the next. First, I went to the Santa Monica flea market with my friend Cynthia. It rained, so many of the vendors did not show up. But I bought stuff anyway: a small, ugly shelf, some mismatched linen napkins, a jelly spoon. On that confessional line on the check where you explain why you bought all those useless items I wrote, retail therapy.
I was feeling some relief after my purchases, until I heard on the radio that rain in Pensacola cost Al Gore the election in 2000 and that rain is predicted in Florida on Tuesday. My blood pressure shot right back up.
I decided to cook some comfort food. But I was so distracted I forgot to put in the spices in the pumpkin muffins, and the pasta fagioli sucked, and even the vanilla pudding was not up to my standards. It tasted like John McCain looked after the third debate.
Finally, I decided the only way to find relief was to mix up an Obamimosa. If you, too, are stressing, I strongly recommend it, even if you are still reeling from last week’s Witchin’ Martini.
Here’s the recipe: put a bunch of flag pins in the freezer (unless you already have some in there, in which case you are probably a McCainiac.) In a pitcher, mix up the juice of three oranges with one cup of chilled orange vodka and add some ice. Then pour in a bottle of champagne. (This is a cocktail that, like Obama, is stirred but never shaken.) Put a flag pin in each person’s glass and pour in the Obamimosa.
If you wake up on November 5th and can’t remember who won, make and drink another Obamimosa. It will a) wake you up long enough to remember who won the election and b) make you drunk enough to either ease the pain if your fave candidate did not win, or get you back in celebratory mode if your fave candidate DID win and you are therefore not considering a move to Canada.