The Crabby Cook - by Jessica Harper

Okay, I’m invited back to the Christmas cookie swap party I went to last year, and I’m finding that my anxiety level about which recipe to cook up for the event has decreased in 2009. This is because I have, in my pocket, a fab recipe for almond logs, which is my golden ticket.

I will also note that this cookie party could never be thrown by employees of Goldman Sachs. I just heard that G.S. has told its employees they are not allowed to host holiday parties for more than twelve people, lest they further irritate the already livid mob who are sick of seeing the G.S.-ers getting and spending lavish bonuses and otherwise whooping it up. Read More

My friend Suzanne is one lucky bitch.

She recently sent me an email, which began, “Tonight Adam and his buddies are making the following meal for themselves.”

Okay, I had to pause there for a second. Adam is Suzanne’s fifteen year-old son, just so you know, so already I was choking with envy: I have thus far never had the opportunity to write a sentence like that regarding my own children. Plus, aren’t teenage boys supposed to be out zooming around on motorcycles, rebelling without a cause? What’s up with this? Read More