The Crabby Cook - by Jessica Harper

So, as I told you in another post, I’ve got a zucchini the size of a Weinermobile in my kitchen.It’s a little bit frightening; it’s a monster. It weighs four pounds, ten ounces, more than my nephew weighed at birth. You could use it as a neck roller, or to clobber a thief or hit a softball. Add some detailing (a couple of olive eyeballs, a red pepper grin), and this vegetable would scare kids on Halloween. But I opted to chop it to pieces and make zucchini chowder.

I half expected the monster to rear up and bite me when I cut through that 4-inch diameter. (Luckily, this did not happen.) Inside, I found some gnarly seeds, so I dug out the little buggers and planted them so I can gift friends with monsters next year. (Actually, I contemplated planting them. If the spirit moves me, I will take the next step and actually commit them to the earth, but this may not happen as I am rather lazy.) Read More